Music For Your Face - Van Halen May 1, 2008
This evening's musical selection is a live Edward Van Halen blasting out his classic "Eruption". Edward always has been, and still is, a Guitar God of the highest caliber. Enjoy the vid. Or Else.
-Satan's Little Gamer
This Just In: Chelsea Clinton = Devil Worshipper May 1, 2008
I just came across a story on Wonkette.com that exposes Chelsea Clinton as a devil worshipper. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
How do we know if there's any truth to the rumor? Check out her necklace. An upside-down cross! What more do you need? She's obviously a full-fledged Satanist! Not that there's anything wrong with that.
What a year this has been. First, we discovered David Hasselhoff to be the Antichrist (that story here) and now we learn that Chelsea Clinton is a devil worshipper. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
The only question that remains is: will this cost Hillary votes?
-Satan's Little Gamer
Video Game Thief Pleads Not-Guilty May 1, 2008
Dennis Fiel, an idiot who allegedly ran into a San Diego video-game store Tuesday, demanded video games (including GTA IV, naturally), sprayed the employees with pepper spray, fled in his white truck and then hid in a Japanese restaurant before being nabbed by the cops, pled not guilty to robbery, use of tear gas, and resisting arrest today.
He is now facing 11 years in prison. Can you freaking believe that? 11 years! With time off for good behavior he'll be out just in time for the release of GTA X!
Let this be a lesson to you, folks. If you're retarded enough to run around acting like life is a video game, they're going to lock you in a tiny cage with a giant ape named "Bubba" who has a penchant for anal rape and they're going to leave you there until you figure out that it isn't.
Wondering why I chose that picture? If you don't think those shorts are a crime, buddy, I feel sorry for you. Kinda makes you wanna gouge out your own eyes with a stick, doesn't it?
-Satan's Little Gamer
Great News For Game Addicts May 1, 2008
I came across an article about a guy who's trying to help "video game addicts" with a 12-step program similar to Alcoholics Anonymous.
According to the article, this guy has his wonderful, life-saving new program, a new book about "video game addiction" coming out, and a brand new one-man show about being a "video game addict" opening soon.
Sounds like he's getting rich and famous as a result of this new "disease" known as "video game addiction". Unless he's doing all of this for free. You know, out of the kindness of his heart? Because he loves helping people? Did I just hear a cash register sound somewhere? (read the article here)
A related study, done by Satan's Little Gamer, found that too much game playing can be bad for you. The good news? There's no such thing as too much game playing.
-Satan's Little Gamer
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